When I discovered beauty was actually important to me.

I had a big A-ha moment about beauty

This week it was, while working on my values with the amazing NLP & Hypnosis trainer and coach Toni Everard. I hadn’t looked at my values for a while and what came up so potently was the importance of BEAUTY. That Life is Beautiful! That I am beautiful!

We forget this, we forget to let ourselves experience beauty daily. For example the sun rising and setting, little fluffy clouds, the leaves glowing in the sunlight, and the feel of the grass under your feet.

This idea of beauty has been ruminating for a few months, as my hair has been going gray and my daughter turned 14, so quite a few moments of OMG I’m getting old, and she is so beautiful, it’s scary to let her out the house!

My thoughts being

I am not allowed to be beautiful, beauty is irrelevant, like it is a bad thing.
Too much attention from men is not safe, and the other girls don’t like it.
There are more important things than beauty, like being kind, smart, and successful.

I have struggled with this concept of beauty my whole life. I must have decided at some point when I was younger that it’s selfish, extravagant and a waste of $$ to have beautiful things. To flaunt my beauty or celebrate my body. To invest in clothes, furnishings or food that is too expensive, or cocktails – heaven forbid!

Yes life can be intense when we experience pain, but the flip side of feeling, is to experience intense pleasure also.

It’s ok to feel pleasure. It makes the pain worth it in a weird, sick way, right?

If we don’t allow the beauty and pleasure in, what is the point of living, to experience only the pain? No way.

Beautiful things are simply beautiful

I can take pleasure in that. Accept pleasure into my life, without feeling bad about it. I can believe that life is beautiful.

As you may be aware I was a photographer in my past career. I love taking portraits, because people are interesting and beautiful. Taking photos of nature I love too, she is amazing!
At Art school, I loved painting, nudes and abstracts. My love of colour, form and storytelling is in my artistic expression. I love to dance and move my body, it feels beautiful. And feeling beautiful is so important for our self esteem and mental health, it releases feel good endorphins.

I realised this week, that if I allow myself to see beauty as a positive, rather than a negative, then I can accept it into my life.

Shocked is an understatement, to realise just how important beauty is to me. And how much I have been denying it. Poor beauty, it’s time to come out and play!

I can now say confidently,

Beauty is pleasure, it releases endorphins.
It’s ok to like beautiful things, they make me feel good.
I am beautiful, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
Embrace pleasure in my own beauty, my body, my mind, my energy.
Other people are beautiful, and I can take pleasure from that.
Nature is beautiful, the trees, the sky, the plants, the animals, the people.
Attention to beauty is a powerful strategy to healing, growth and wellness.

I am so grateful for this beautiful life.

To celebrate your beauty, my friend and photographer Grier Nielsen, featured below, has put together an offer called FLOCK50. as she is turning 50 in 2024. Her idea is to photograph 50 women in their 50’s looking and feeling beautiful. With a gorgeous coffee table book, prints and an art exhibtion to celebrate together. If this is something that calls to you, reach out to Grier for a chat at Bohemian Ekko Creative

Life is beautiful!

Peace and Love, Toni

PS. I retitled myself to Your Calm Coach!

If you would like to work on feeling beautiful this Summer, I am here to help you create calm, confidence and connection to yourself, reducing stress, anxiety and emotional overwhelm. To connect with your inner beauty and be grateful for your beautiful life! Book in with me for a chat.